Seriously, I don't know why you all read my ramblings. Sometimes I re-read my blog posts and cringe. Did I really say that? Who says things like that? Even I get real tired of my shit sometimes, so I can only assume that you all are either saints, or have an infinite amount of patience with me. Whatever the case may be, you all are the bomb. No diggity, no doubt. (Sorry -- there I go saying weird 90's child stuff again. Sometimes -- in case you haven't noticed -- I like to pretend that I'm funny. Only sometimes. I promise.)
And if you aren't here for my equally pathetic attempts at humor or food photography, you could just be here for the recipe... so let's just move on to that. Cool? Cool.
I have to admit, I'm kind of loving all of the snow here in Columbus, lately. I leave my blinds cracked before I go to sleep every night so that I can wake up and see a sparkling blanket of pearly white blanketing the area. Uh -- but confession time -- looking at it is probably as far as I enjoy it. I have Raynaud's Syndrome, which essentially means that I'm constantly cold. So even though I love skiing and snowball fights, I tend to associate snow/cold weather with pain. It's sad, I know. Also-- I'm kind of a neurotic driver, so driving in snow and ice gives me anxiety to the max. As a result, my instinctive, knee-jerk reaction every morning, after poking my head out the front door of the apartment like a turtle and admiring the landscape for a quick minute, is to turn around and run back to bed, hiding under the sheets and watching How I Met Your Mother reruns until spring comes.
Unfortunately, that's not realistic. Apparently when you call your professor to tell him that you can't make it to your final exam because you're essentially allergic to the cold and driving in the snow, his reaction includes uncontrollable laughter, followed by a swift "You will be there or you will fail." Yeah, when you have dreams of going to law school, a threat like that'll light a fire swiftly enough under your numb, freezing tush. Anyway, I'm on winter break now, so thankfully, I don't really have to deal with it. I'm free to sit at home and make faux Larabar balls. I can even roll them in shredded coconut, which kind of looks like snow, but is a lot more fun to roll around in your hands for extended periods of time.
These are delicious pre-workout, post-workout, and any time you need a quick energy boost. Once I make them, I wrap 'em up in plastic wrap and throw them in the freezer. I like my sweets cold -- personal preference -- and they're extra delicious when they're frozen in my humble opinion.
Coconut Blueberry "Faux-Lara" Balls
1/2 cup chopped Medjool dates
1/4 cup unsweetened dried blueberries
1/4 cup whole almonds
1/4 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 cup unsweetened shredded coconut
1 drop almond extract (optional)
Place the dates and the blueberries into a food processor and pulse until the mixture forms a paste. Transfer the mixture to a separate mixing bowl.
Then dump your almonds into the food processor. Pulse until well chopped. Transfer the nut mixture into the mixing bowl that contains the date/blueberry mixture. Add the cinnamon. If using almond extract, add it to the bowl at this time. Use your hands to combine well.
Using your fingers slowly form the mixture into balls. Spread the coconut shreds out onto a piece of parchment paper and then slowly roll the balls across the sheet, covering them in coconut. Wrap in plastic wrap and refrigerate/freeze until ready to eat.